If you have any questions of criticisms of the way I play Tublicain Alhambra, leave 'em here. Either with your name or anon if you'd rather.

Dear City,

Sometimes you can be so boring. C'mon, liven it up a bit. Celebrate! Drink the streets, have sex in public view!

At least this person decapitating everyone has close to the right idea. Now if we could just make it a bit more public.

Signed,

Tublicain Alhambra

P.S.

Won't someone come play?

What's this, what's this, what iiiiiis this?


Policia, eh? The fuzz breathing down my neck? How quaint.

What will I be brought in on, I wonder? Will you take me in on violence, murder, the removal of souls?

Or my more mundane crimes? My drug businesses, my gambling, my prostitution, eh?

I bought and sold your type. Your type was mine to command in Brazil.


That being said, if there are some of you that need a little money and don't particularly care where it comes from...

Then, we'll talk, you and I.

Feeling... hungry Warrant Officer?

We can't have all the fun of feeding off the populace, after all. Just stay away from Valentine. If you eat him, I'll be the one that has to listen him complain about it all week.

The Major gets some sort of horrible... plague thing and all operations are put on hold. You'd think he never got sick in however old he is.

Will you all clear this up so he can get back to the simple task of blowing you all up? Cards are fun, but I'm looking for the ultimate gamble.

Here is the truth.

I am simply better dressed than you. All of you.

Don't feel too bad about it, though. It'd be like any art student feeling bad that he is not Leonardo da Vinci.

You are simply so far out of your league that you cannot even comprehend it.

It was a pleasure meeting you, Miss Bianca. So many of the vampires here are so...

housebroken.

What is wrong with all of you? Drinking preserved blood.

Or animal?

Don't you remember?

The blood is the life.

You call these things zombies?

Pathetic.

[[Sounds of moaning, followed by swift, airy noises and eventually bodily squelches]]

Ah well. Fun target practice if nothing else.

I would invite you all to a game of roulette tonight, but I expect your rather busy with that demon thing. Unfortunately, I really can't find myself to be bothered by it.

Have fun killing the abomination, I'll be having a good time.

Now.

Wasn't that fun?


I certainly had fun. Zorin, Jan, Schrodinger?

You see, war has this unfair generalization. That it is ugly and terrible.

But I think proved today that war can be quite stylish.

There. Takes a bit but the arm's finally back to fighting speed.

Thanks, Alucard, for cutting along the seam. Much easier to mend.

Now... what to do tonight, mm?

Do any of my friends have anything fun in mind?